Motherhood in UX

Can we discuss motherhood and UX? Some things I'd suggest to anyone who wishes to be working parent. I've had 2 babies, both leading up to and during COVID so my experiences might be unique, yet I believe the advice will relate to all.

1. Find a stable, large company with a promising benefits package.

It's uncomfortable to ask about maternity leave especially if its not a priority yet, but women get the short end of the stick when they discover that mat leave either doesn't exist or is very very short. For my 1st company it was 16 weeks. For my 2nd company I worked for, because I was a contractor, it was 3 weeks. Yikes.

2. Choose full time over contracting.

Some designers really prefer working as contractors but you're also very uh....disposable (?) can I use that term? as a contractor, especially if you're pregnant. My contract got cut in half as I was 9 months pregnant, and there really wasn't much I could do. I was told I would have FMLA leave, but you need to have been with the company for 12 months to get that. Plus it was unpaid, so, it wouldn't have been helpful anyway.

3. Read your benefits package carefully and inquire about the rules of maternity leave.

Most companies have rules around maternity / paternity leaves BUT the catch is that there are asterisks. Even companies as big as J.P. Morgan have rules that say that you need to be with the company for 12 months to be able to receive mat leave. Listen, sometimes, you can't plan a pregnancy with THAT level of precision. 😂 Confirm exactly how much time you will get and what are the rules around when you can get the benefit.

4. Build out a community of fellow working moms and dads. Parents of all walks of life.

I was a pretty young mom for American standards (Slavic background 😂.) and I had to navigate figuring out working and planning for a baby, and being pregnant, all by myself. I regret not having a stronger community of women who could have pointed out tools, methods, communities, places to seek advice out, earlier. It doesn't have to be lonely, and historically, we are first of our type! We have to prioritize, balance, and figure out motherhood, being engaged in our day jobs, our own growth as humans and so much more. A standing ovation for every woman doing the damn thing.

5. Pregnancy is one thing....the 4th trimester and beyond are its own different test.

Pregnancy was tough. Dragging a pump to the office in a crowded shuttle bus, and pumping every 3 hours in a small, poorly lit office room that smelled like old popcorn, was something else. For the first 12 months of your baby's life, you will still be going through your own changes. Hormones, post-partum depression / blues, incredible lack of sleep, a new "reality"....it's a lot. We need systemic changes. Until then, create a budget for a babysitter / nanny so you and your spouse can catch a break.